This is an IELTS writing task 2 sample answer on the topic of languages dying out from the real IELTS exam.
I found the 3rd paragraph really difficult – check it out below!
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Dave
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer General Training: Dying Languages (Real Past IELTS Test/Exam)
Many local languages today are dying out due to the rise of languages like English.
Is this a positive or negative development?
The ubiquity of English as a lingua franca is leading to lesser known languages fading away. Although this is a great cultural loss for the world as a whole, it is a positive development for the ethnic groups in question.
Those who regret these loses point out the irreplaceable role of unique languages among ethnic peoples. A good example of this would be in India which is home to 22 national languages and hundreds of unofficial languages in various states of decay. Once a region begins to assimilate and learn English and Hindi, their native tongue becomes antiquated. Since language does more to shape how we see the world than our vision, this also means an interpretation of the world falls away. Over time, younger people will tend to follow global or national trends rather than local ones and the culture itself will be at risk.
Despite the disadvantages mentioned above, assimilation means progress. Western tourists might feel their right to see authentic ethnic minorities is being stripped away, but those groups typically want better lives for themselves and their children. Speaking a language known only to a small group of people greatly limits your opportunities. You can remain in your village and live below the poverty line your entire life or learn a widely-spoken language and be able to travel, work and stay abreast of developments abroad. Even if they do not leave the country, they can move to bigger cities and pursue their passion. Those that remain in their villages, will have better chances of finding online work as well.
In conclusion, the disappearance of smaller languages is inevitable and positive from a purely utilitarian point of view. It would be great to find a means of supporting indigenous tribes that choose to preserve their ancestors way of life.
Word Count: 300
Analysis
1. The ubiquity of English as a lingua franca is leading to lesser known languages fading away. 2. Although this is a great cultural loss for the world as a whole, it is a positive development for the ethnic groups in question.
Paraphrase the overall essay topic.
Give your opinion.
1. Those who regret these loses point out the irreplaceable role of unique languages among ethnic peoples. 2. A good example of this would be in India which is home to 22 national languages and hundreds of unofficial languages in various states of decay. 3. Once a region begins to assimilate and learn English and Hindi, their native tongue becomes antiquated. 4. Since language does more to shape how we see the world than our vision, this also means an interpretation of the world falls away. 5. Over time, younger people will tend to follow global or national trends rather than local ones and the culture itself will be at risk.
Write a clear topic sentence with a single main idea.
Develop it with an example.
Keep developing the example.
State the results of your example.
Further state the results.
1. Despite the disadvantages mentioned above, assimilation means progress. 2. Western tourists might feel their right to see authentic ethnic minorities is being stripped away, but those groups typically want better lives for themselves and their children. 3. Speaking a language known only to a small group of people greatly limits your opportunities. 4. You can remain in your village and live below the poverty line your entire life or learn a widely-spoken language and be able to travel, work and stay abreast of developments abroad. 5. Even if they do not leave the country, they can move to bigger cities and pursue their passion. 6. Those that remain in their villages, will have better chances of finding online work as well.
Another topic sentence with a main idea at the end.
Explain your main idea if it needs explanation.
Develop your main idea with specific, clear support.
Add in as much detail as possible.
Continue with more detail.
The more secific and detailed the better!
1. In conclusion, the disappearance of smaller languages is inevitable and positive from a purely utilitarian point of view. 2. It would be great to find a means of supporting indigenous tribes that choose to preserve their ancestors way of life.
Repeat your opinion.
Add in a final thought/extra detail.
Vocabulary
The ubiquity of English as a lingua franca is leading to lesser known languages fading away. Although this is a great cultural loss for the world as a whole, it is a positive development for the ethnic groups in question.
Those who regret these loses point out the irreplaceable role of unique languages among ethnic peoples. A good example of this would be in India which is home to 22 national languages and hundreds of unofficial languages in various states of decay. Once a region begins to assimilate and learn English and Hindi, their native tongue becomes antiquated. Since language does more to shape how we see the world than our vision, this also means an interpretation of the world falls away. Over time, younger people will tend to follow global or national trends rather than local ones and the culture itself will be at risk.
Despite the disadvantages mentioned above, assimilation means progress. Western tourists might feel their right to see authentic ethnic minorities is being stripped away, but those groups typically want better lives for themselves and their children. Speaking a language known only to a small group of people greatly limits your opportunities. You can remain in your village and live below the poverty line your entire life or learn a widely-spoken language and be able to travel, work and stay abreast of developments abroad. Even if they do not leave the country, they can move to bigger cities and pursue their passion. Those that remain in their villages, will have better chances of finding online work as well.
In conclusion, the disappearance of smaller languages is inevitable and positive from a purely utilitarian point of view. It would be great to find a means of supporting indigenous tribes that choose to preserve their ancestors way of life.
Answers
ubiquity common
lingua franca common language
lesser known not as common
fading away disappearing
great cultural loss loss of heritage
world as a whole globally
ethnic groups in question the relevant minorities
regret feel bad about
irreplaceable role crucial
unique special
national languages common language recognised by the government
unofficial languages smaller languages in a country
various states of decay starting to disappear
assimilate become part of the culture
native tongue native language
antiquated old/outdated
shape mold/influence
vision seeing
interpretation opinion
falls away disappears
tend likely to
follow global or national trends globalisation
at risk in danger
assimilation noun of assimilate
progress modernity
authentic ethnic minorities real groups
stripped away taken away
greatly limits your opportunities not as many options
remain stay
below the poverty line very poor
widely-spoken language common language
abreast up to date about
pursue their passion study/work in the field they want
finding online work getting a job you can work from a computer
inevitable will happen
purely utilitarian point of view completely concerned with the use or practical aspect
supporting indigenous tribes helping ethnic groups
preserve their ancestors way of life keep alive their cultural history
The u___________ of English as a l___________ is leading to l___________ languages f___________. Although this is a g___________ for the w___________, it is a positive development for the e___________.
Those who r___________ these loses point out the i___________ of u___________ languages among ethnic peoples. A good example of this would be in India which is home to 22 n___________ and hundreds of u___________ in v___________. Once a region begins to a___________ and learn English and Hindi, their n___________ becomes a___________. Since language does more to s___________ how we see the world than our v___________, this also means an i___________ of the world f___________. Over time, younger people will t___________ to f___________or n___________ rather than local ones and the culture itself will be a___________.
Despite the disadvantages mentioned above, a___________ means p___________. Western tourists might feel their right to see a___________ is being s___________, but those groups typically want better lives for themselves and their children. Speaking a language known only to a small group of people g___________. You can r___________ in your village and live b___________ your entire life or learn a w___________ and be able to travel, work and stay a___________ of developments abroad. Even if they do not leave the country, they can move to bigger cities and p___________. Those that remain in their villages, will have better chances of f___________ as well.
In conclusion, the disappearance of smaller languages is i___________ and positive from a p___________. It would be great to find a means of s___________ that choose to p___________.
Listen and check:
Listening Practice
Watch the video below for some more ideas and examples in case if a similar question comes up on your exam:
Reading Practice
Read more here about this interesting topic from National Geographic:
This is an IELTS writing task 2 sample answer from the general training exam on the topic of fame and the internet.
It seems to be pretty simple but it is still a real challenge to think of relevant main ideas and support them with specific examples.
Read on to see how I handled it!
Please consider signing up for my Patreon here in order to support my efforts and receive exclusive Ebooks and materials related to IELTS!
Dave
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Answer General Training: Fame (Real Past IELTS Test/Exam)
Due to television and the internet it is easier today for a large number of people to become famous.
Is this a positive or negative development?
Real Past IELTS Exams/Tests
It is easier than ever today for people to become famous because of increased channels for distribution such as television and the internet. This is clearly a positive trend as it opens up the entertainment industry to greater diversity.
Those that decry this trend typically point to talentless celebrities. In the past, a comedian or musician might work for years honing their craft in order to get a slot on one of the few talkshows and then become famous overnight. Nowadays, many celebrities start on reality TV or a YouTube channel and do not have any discernible talents. The socialite Paris Hilton was one of the first to take advantage of her wealth and personality to build a brand without any real product. Kim Kardashian is a more recent example of an individual who through dating celebrities and canny use of social media and television was able to become a celebrity in her own right.
Despite the aforementioned cases, this is on a whole a positive trend because of the more diverse range of famous people today. Fame used to be the prerogative of white men and women, with the occasional exception from an ethnic group. One of the reasons for this is that whites typically come from more privileged backgrounds and have greater opportunity, thereby making up a disproportionate share of success stories. The internet in particular has levelled the playing field to an extent. Anyone with a smartphone today has the ability to broadcast their talents and cultivate a loyal fanbase, regardless of gender or ethnicity and without the barriers that existed in the past such as ingrained reluctance from authority figures to give certain ethnicities an honest chance.
In conclusion, there are clear cultural drawbacks to the ease with which many achieve fame but today it is nonetheless more inclusive. A greater concern should be the age at which people become famous as it can have developmental side effects.
Analysis
1. It is easier than ever today for people to become famous because of increased channels for distribution such as television and the internet. 2. This is clearly a positive trend as it opens up the entertainment industry to greater diversity.
Paraphrase the overall topic for the essay.
State your opinion clearly – don’t sit in the middle. You must choose a side.
1. Those that decry this trend typically point to talentless celebrities. 2. In the past, a comedian or musician might work for years honing their craft in order to get a slot on one of the few talkshows and then become famous overnight. 3. Nowadays, many celebrities start on reality TV or a YouTube channel and do not have any discernible talents. 4. The socialite Paris Hilton was one of the first to take advantage of her wealth and personality to build a brand without any real product. 5. Kim Kardashian is a more recent example of an individual who through dating celebrities and canny use of social media and television was able to become a celebrity in her own right.
Write a topic sentence with a clear main idea at the end.
Begin to develop your main idea. A good way to start is by comparing with the past.
Contrast the past with the present and explain a specific difference.
Give a clear example.
You can develop the same example or add another like I did here.
1. Despite the aforementioned cases, this is on a whole a positive trend because of the more diverse range of famous people today. 2. Fame used to be the prerogative of white men and women, with the occasional exception from an ethnic group. 3. One of the reasons for this is that whites typically come from more privileged backgrounds and have greater opportunity, thereby making up a disproportionate share of success stories. 4. The internet in particular has levelled the playing field to an extent. 5. Anyone with a smartphone today has the ability to broadcast their talents and cultivate a loyal fanbase, regardless of gender or ethnicity and without the barriers that existed in the past such as ingrained reluctance from authority figures to give certain ethnicities an honest chance.
Include another topic sentence with a new main idea.
Begin to develop your new main idea.
You can support your main idea with a logical arguments. Make sure that your ideas connect and flow naturally.
Vary your use of long and short sentences.
Draw out the conclusions/results of your argument to make your paragraph really strong.
1. In conclusion, there are clear cultural drawbacks to the ease with which many achieve fame but today it is nonetheless more inclusive. 2. A greater concern should be the age at which people become famous as it can have developmental side effects.
Repeat your opinion.
Add in an extra detail or final thought for full points from the examiner.
Vocabulary
What do the words in bold below mean?
It is easier than ever today for people to become famous because of increased channels for distribution such as television and the internet. This is clearly a positive trend as it opens up the entertainment industry to greater diversity.
Those that decry this trend typically point to talentless celebrities. In the past, a comedian or musician might work for years honing their craft in order to get a slot on one of the few talkshows and then become famous overnight. Nowadays, many celebrities start on reality TV or a YouTube channel and do not have any discernible talents. The socialite Paris Hilton was one of the first to take advantage of her wealth and personality to build a brand without any real product. Kim Kardashian is a more recent example of an individual who through dating celebrities and canny use of social media and television was able to become a celebrity in her own right.
Despite the aforementioned cases, this is on a whole a positive trend because of the more diverse range of famous people today. Fame used to be the prerogative of white men and women, with the occasional exception from an ethnic group. One of the reasons for this is that whites typically come from more privileged backgrounds and have greater opportunity, thereby making up a disproportionate share of success stories. The internet in particular has levelled the playing field to an extent. Anyone with a smartphone today has the ability to broadcast their talents and cultivate a loyal fanbase, regardless of gender or ethnicity and without the barriers that existed in the past such as ingrained reluctance from authority figures to give certain ethnicities an honest chance.
In conclusion, there are clear cultural drawbacks to the ease with which many achieve fame but today it is nonetheless more inclusive. A greater concern should be the age at which people become famous as it can have developmental side effects.
Answers
easier than ever today become more possible
channels for distribution ways of getting your content out
opens up allows for
entertainment industry movies, TV, music, etc.
greater diversity more different types of
decry rail against
talentless not good at anything
honing their craft getting better at their job
get a slot have a time
talkshows late night shows
overnight suddenly
discernible talents obvious abilities
socialite dilletant
take advantage exploit
wealth money
build a brand become well known
canny use intelligent use
in her own right on her own
aforementioned cases what was said before
on a whole overall
diverse range lots of possibilities
prerogative right
occasional exception odd situation
ethnic group minority
privileged backgrounds rich
making up consisting of
disproportionate share take up too much
levelled the playing field makes everything equal/even
broadcast send out
cultivate develop
loyal fanbase passionate supporters
barriers roadblocks
ingrained reluctance inherent disinclination
authority figures those in power
ethnicities people from various cultures
honest chance actually possible
clear cultural drawbacks obvious disadvantages for the culture
It is e______________ for people to become famous because of increased c______________ such as television and the internet. This is clearly a positive trend as it o______________ the e______________ to g______________.
Those that d______________ this trend typically point to t______________ celebrities. In the past, a comedian or musician might work for years h______________ in order to g______________ on one of the few t______________ and then become famous o______________. Nowadays, many celebrities start on reality TV or a YouTube channel and do not have any d______________. The s______________ Paris Hilton was one of the first to t______________ of her w______________ and personality to b______________ without any real product. Kim Kardashian is a more recent example of an individual who through dating celebrities and c______________ of social media and television was able to become a celebrity i______________.
Despite the a______________, this is o______________ a positive trend because of the more d______________ of famous people today. Fame used to be the p______________ of white men and women, with the o______________ from an e______________. One of the reasons for this is that whites typically come from more p______________ and have greater opportunity, thereby m______________ a d______________ of success stories. The internet in particular has l______________ to an extent. Anyone with a smartphone today has the ability to b______________ their talents and c______________, regardless of gender or ethnicity and without the b______________ that existed in the past such as i______________ from a______________ to give certain e______________ an h______________.
In conclusion, there are c______________ to the ease with which many achieve fame but today it is nonetheless more i______________. A greater concern should be the age at which people become famous as it can have d______________.
Listen and check:
Listening Practice
This video might help you to think of a different main idea from my own:
Reading Practice
Read an interesting (and difficult!) article below about the daughter of a famous psychologist:
The rise of the one percent and accumulated capital has led many people today to question the basic value of raw ambition. In my opinion, though ambition has historical importance, it is a largely negative trait for most of society today.
Ambition’s value lies in pushing forward human progress. Some of the best evidence of this comes from advances in science. Galileo was a determined astronomer, willing to doubt ingrained dogma in order to propagate his heretical view and we owe the basis of our understanding of the planetary system to him. A more recent example would be discoveries like penicilin and vaccines in the 20th century that were all the result of highly ambitious, driven individuals whose legacies endure to this day. Without their aspirations, human civilisation would have stagnated.
However, ambition for its own sake hurts society. When ambition is severed from passion and ethics, it becomes the raw engine of political and economic greed. A good example of this would be the rampant speculation fueling Wall Street. Most employees at large brokerage firms are ambitious in terms of moving up the ladder and making more money for their clients but have little concern for the consequences of their actions. Reckless investment spurred on by greed was one of the underlying causes of the sub-prime mortgage scandal that led to a global financial crisis in 2008 during which millions of homeowners and investors lost their retirement savings. Unchecked, ambition will always tend towards excess and society will always be left to reckon with the aftermath.
In conclusion, ambition is a crucial drive behind human civilisation but it is not a positive force on its own. It is important for parents and educators to serve as good role models to inspire children to check ambition with conscience.
Analysis
1. The rise of the one percent and accumulated capital has led many people today to question the basic value of raw ambition. 2. In my opinion, though ambition has historical importance, it is a largely negative trait for most of society today.
Paraphrase the overall topic of the essay.
Give your opinion – make it clear and answer both questions.
1. Ambition’s value lies in pushing forward human progress. 2. Some of the best evidence of this comes from advances in science. 3. Galileo was a determined astronomer, willing to doubt ingrained dogma in order to propagate his heretical view and we owe the basis of our understanding of the planetary system to him. 4. A more recent example would be discoveries like penicilin and vaccines in the 20th century that were all the result of highly ambitious, driven individuals whose legacies endure to this day. 5. Without their aspirations, human civilisation would have stagnated.
Write a topic sentence with a clear main idea at the end of it.
Begin to develop your main idea.
Use specific people for this question as examples.
You can continue with the same example if you know it well or give another, more recent example.
Conclude by related it back to the topic question.
1. However, ambition for its own sake hurts society. 2. When ambition is severed from passion and ethics, it becomes the raw engine of political and economic greed. 3. A good example of this would be the rampant speculation fueling Wall Street. 4. Most employees at large brokerage firms are ambitious in terms of moving up the ladder and making more money for their clients but have little concern for the consequences of their actions. 5. Reckless investment spurred on by greed was one of the underlying causes of the sub-prime mortgage scandal that led to a global financial crisis in 2008 during which millions of homeowners and investors lost their retirement savings. 6. Unchecked, ambition will always tend towards excess and society will always be left to reckon with the aftermath.
Write another topic sentence with another clear main idea at the end. These sentences can be short and simply.
Begin to develop your main idea.
Give another example.
Develop your example with specific details and strong vocabulary.
Continue with the same example if possible.
Draw conclusions at the end of your paragraph and relate it back to the overall topic.
1. In conclusion, ambition is a crucial drive behind human civilisation but it is not a positive force on its own. 2. It is important for parents and educators to serve as good role models to inspire children to check ambition with conscience.
Repeat your opinion for the two questions.
Add in an extra detail/final thought to get full marks from the examiner.
Vocabulary
What do the words in bold below mean?
The rise of the one percent and accumulated capital has led many people today to question the basic value of raw ambition. In my opinion, though ambition has historical importance, it is a largely negative trait for most of society today.
Ambition’s value lies in pushing forwardhuman progress. Some of the best evidence of this comes from advances in science. Galileo was a determined astronomer, willing to doubt ingrained dogma in order to propagate his heretical view and we owe the basis of our understanding of the planetary system to him. A more recent example would be discoveries like penicilin and vaccines in the 20th century that were all the result of highly ambitious, driven individuals whose legacies endure to this day. Without their aspirations, human civilisation would have stagnated.
However, ambition for its own sake hurts society. When ambition is severed from passion and ethics, it becomes the raw engine of political and economic greed. A good example of this would be the rampant speculation fueling Wall Street. Most employees at large brokerage firms are ambitious in terms of moving up the ladder and making more money for their clients but have little concern for the consequences of their actions. Reckless investment spurred on by greed was one of the underlying causes of the sub-prime mortgage scandal that led to a global financial crisis in 2008 during which millions of homeowners and investors lost their retirement savings. Unchecked, ambition will always tend towards excess and society will always be left to reckon with the aftermath.
In conclusion, ambition is a crucial drive behind human civilisation but it is not a positive force on its own. It is important for parents and educators to serve as good role models to inspire children to check ambition with conscience.
Answers
the one percent the richest people on Earth
accumulated capital lots of money, assets
question doubt
basic value importance
raw ambition base desire to get ahead
historical importance significance/weight
lies is contained in
pushing forward driving on/encouraging
human progress civilisation
determined astronomer ambitious astronomer
doubt ingrained dogma question the way things are done
propagate spread
heretical view opinion outside what is accepted
planetary system the galaxy
penicilin antibiotics
vaccines shots to immunise
driven encouraged/forced on
legacies endure remembered forever
aspirations dreams
stagnated stalled/stopped
for its own sake on its own
severed cut off from
passion caring deeply about
ethics morals
raw engine basic drive/desire
greed always wanting more
rampant speculation fueling widespread, hasty investment contributing to
Wall Street the New York financial centre
brokerage firms trading companies
moving up the ladder getting promotions/progression
little concern don’t care about
consequences of their actions results of what they did
reckless investment spurred on speculation created by
underlying causes foundations
sub-prime mortgage scandal trading bad mortgages
global financial crisis economic downturn
homeowners people who own houses
retirement savings nest egg
unchecked without regulation
tend likely to
excess over-the-top
left to reckon with the aftermath have to deal with the results
crucial drive important desire
on its own by itself
serve as good role models someone to look up to
inspire encourage
check ambition with conscience control your worst desires
The rise of t_____________ and a_____________ has led many people today to q_____________ the b_____________ of r_____________. In my opinion, though ambition has h_____________, it is a largely negative trait for most of society today.
Ambition’s value l_____________ in p_____________h_____________. Some of the best evidence of this comes from advances in science. Galileo was a d_____________, willing to d_____________ in order to p_____________ his h_____________ and we owe the basis of our understanding of the p_____________ to him. A more recent example would be discoveries like p_____________ and v_____________ in the 20th century that were all the result of highly ambitious, d_____________ individuals whose l_____________ to this day. Without their a_____________, human civilisation would have s_____________.
However, ambition f_____________ hurts society. When ambition is s_____________ from p_____________ and e_____________, it becomes the r_____________ of political and economic g_____________. A good example of this would be the r_____________W_____________. Most employees at large b_____________ are ambitious in terms of m_____________ and making more money for their clients but have l_____________ for the c_____________. R_____________ by greed was one of the u_____________ of the s_____________ that led to a g_____________ in 2008 during which millions of h_____________ and investors lost their r_____________. U_____________, ambition will always t_____________ towards e_____________ and society will always be l_____________.
In conclusion, ambition is a c_____________ behind human civilisation but it is not a positive force o_____________. It is important for parents and educators to s_____________ to i_____________ children to c_____________.
Listen and check:
Listening Practice
Listen about a similar topic here, motivation:
Reading Practice
Read about whether or not ambition is good or bad below:
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Online shopping is becoming more common these days.
What effect could this have on the environment and the types of jobs required?
Real Past IELTS Tests/Exams
The ubiquity of online shopping has brought with it concerns about the environment and an evolving job market. In my opinion, online shopping increases fossil fuel emissions and requires a massive, unskilled workforce for both delivery and production.
Online shopping uses fossil fuels in the making and transportation of goods. In order to manufacture a given product, such as a television, book, or bag of muesli, there is an environmental cost from sourcing and transporting all the elements, powering the factory that assembles it, and creating the plastic packaging, which is also a petroleum byproduct. In the case of a large company like Amazon, the product must be driven or flown to various centres around the country in order to be available for next day delivery. From the storage warehouse, it is then driven or flown to the consumer who ordered it, further burning fossil fuels. The net impact on the environment is self-evidently massive and hastens climate change.
Moreover, online shopping is such a sprawling business that it manipulates the labour market. First of all, there are the workers directly involved. Deliverymen must pack, unpack and ship products while the whole operation also requires a variety of managers, foremen, and office workers. These workers are notoriously underpaid and exploited when working for the largest online retailers, who also streamline the means of production in order to offer the lowest prices. Instead of sourcing from local businesses, which would be slightly more expensive, they opt for large factories largely based in China that can cheaply and quickly produce standardised products. This requires an army of factory workers, working at low wages in unsafe conditions.
In conclusion, online shopping contributes greatly to climate change and has created deep fissures in the job market. Governments should regulate these companies before their rampant profit-driven efficiency has unforeseen social and political implications.
Word Count: 304
Analysis
1. The ubiquity of online shopping has brought with it concerns about the environment and an evolving job market. 2. In my opinion, online shopping increases fossil fuel emissions and requires a massive, unskilled workforce for both delivery and production.
My first sentence simply paraphrases what the overall topic is about.
The second sentence is my opinion – make sure that it is 100% clear!
1. Online shopping uses fossil fuels in the making and transportation of goods. 2. In order to manufacture a given product, such as a television, book, or bag of muesli, there is an environmental cost from sourcing and transporting all the elements, powering the factory that assembles it, and creating the plastic packaging, which is also a petroleum byproduct. 3. In the case of a large company like Amazon, the product must be driven or flown to various centres around the country in order to be available for next day delivery. 4. From the storage warehouse, it is then driven or flown to the consumer who ordered it, further burning fossil fuels. 5. The net impact on the environment is self-evidently massive and hastens climate change.
Write a topic sentence with a clear main idea at the end of the sentence.
Begin to develop your main idea with specific support. Notice how the specific support pulls out lots of great vocabulary related to the topic.
Continue and try to use real companies like Amazon to support your main idea.
Your paragraph and ideas should have a natural flow of ideas.
In my last sentence I generalise a bit and relate it back to the overall question of the essay.
1. Moreover, online shopping is such a sprawling business that it manipulates the labour market. 2. First of all, there are the workers directly involved. 3. Deliverymen must pack, unpack and ship products while the whole operation also requires a variety of managers, foremen, and office workers. 4. These workers are notoriously underpaid and exploited when working for the largest online retailers, who also streamline the means of production in order to offer the lowest prices. 5. Instead of sourcing from local businesses, which would be slightly more expensive, they opt for large factories largely based in China that can cheaply and quickly produce standardised products. 6. This requires an army of factory workers, working at low wages in unsafe conditions.
Write another topic sentence with a clear main idea.
Begin to develop this one as well. Notice that I sometimes use long, sometimes short, sentences.
Describe what happens with great detail and list as many jobs as you can.
Describe the impact of these jobs – they are generally not regarded as quality jobs.
Continue developing your main idea and writing about how the jobs are different.
Draw conclusions/generalise with your last sentence.
1. In conclusion, online shopping contributes greatly to climate change and has created deep fissures in the job market. 2. Governments should regulate these companies before their rampant profit-driven efficiency has unforeseen social and political implications.
Repeat your opinion and main ideas – don’t make this sentence too long.
Add in a final thought/detail for full marks from the IELTS examiner.
Vocabulary
What do the words in bold below mean?
The ubiquity of online shopping has brought with it concerns about the environment and an evolving job market. In my opinion, online shopping increases fossil fuel emissions and requires a massive, unskilled workforce for both delivery and production.
Online shopping uses fossil fuels in the making and transportation of goods. In order to manufacture a given product, such as a television, book, or bag of muesli, there is an environmental cost from sourcing and transporting all the elements, powering the factory that assembles it, and creating the plastic packaging, which is also a petroleum byproduct. In the case of a large company like Amazon, the product must be driven or flown to various centres around the country in order to be available for next day delivery. From the storage warehouse, it is then driven or flown to the consumer who ordered it, further burning fossil fuels. The net impact on the environment is self-evidently massive and hastens climate change.
Moreover, online shopping is such a sprawling business that it manipulates the labour market. First of all, there are the workers directly involved. Deliverymen must pack, unpack and ship products while the whole operation also requires a variety of managers, foremen, and office workers. These workers are notoriously underpaid and exploited when working for the largest online retailers, who also streamline the means of production in order to offer the lowest prices. Instead of sourcing from local businesses, which would be slightly more expensive, they opt for large factories largely based in China that can cheaply and quickly produce standardised products. This requires an army of factory workers, working at low wages in unsafe conditions.
In conclusion, online shopping contributes greatly to climate change and has created deep fissures in the job market. Governments should regulate these companies before their rampant profit-driven efficiency has unforeseen social and political implications.
Answers
ubiquity common
brought with it concerns also adds worries
evolving job market changing employment practices
fossil fuel emissions buring oil
unskilled workforce labourers
delivery mailing/sending
production making
manufacture producing
given product whatever it is they make
muesli cereal with oats, dried fruits, etc.
sourcing getting it from
elements parts
powering making operate
assembles puts together
packaging how it is wrapped
petroleum byproduct also comes from oil
centres buildings
next day delivery getting your package within 24hrs
storage warehouse where they stockpile products
burning fossil fuels contributing to climate change
net impact overall effect
self-evidently massive clearly huge
hastens speeds up
sprawling business very large operation
manipulates has control over
directly involved contribute to clearly
deliverymen people who carry packages
whole operation entire business
notoriously underpaid famously poorly paid
exploited taken advantage of
online retailers companies that sell products online
streamline make more efficient
means of production how something is made
offer have
opt for choose
based in located in
standardised all the same, consistent
army of factory workers lots of workers
low wages little salary
unsafe conditions dangerous working situation
greatly a lot
deep fissures fractured/huge gaps
rampant profit-driven efficiency uncontrolled pursuit of money
The u_____________ of online shopping has b_____________ about the environment and an e_____________. In my opinion, online shopping increases f_____________ and requires a massive, u_____________ for both d_____________ and p_____________.
Online shopping uses fossil fuels in the making and transportation of goods. In order to m_____________ a g_____________, such as a television, book, or bag of m_____________, there is an environmental cost from s_____________ and transporting all the e_____________, p_____________ the factory that a_____________ it, and creating the plastic p_____________, which is also a p_____________. In the case of a large company like Amazon, the product must be driven or flown to various c_____________ around the country in order to be available for n_____________ . From the s_____________, it is then driven or flown to the consumer who ordered it, further b_____________. The n_____________ on the environment is s_____________ and h_____________ climate change.
Moreover, online shopping is such a s_____________ that it manipulates the labour market. First of all, there are the workers d_____________. D_____________ must pack, unpack and ship products while the w_____________ also requires a variety of managers, foremen, and office workers. These workers are n_____________ and e_____________ when working for the largest o_____________, who also s_____________ the m_____________ in order to o_____________ the lowest prices. Instead of sourcing from local businesses, which would be slightly more expensive, they o_____________ large factories largely b_____________ China that can cheaply and quickly produce s_____________ products. This requires an a_____________, working at low w_____________ in u_____________.
In conclusion, online shopping contributes g_____________ to climate change and has created d_____________ in the job market. Governments should regulate these companies before their r_____________ has u_____________ social and political i_____________ .
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